Blog #27 Mind the Gap
How aligned are the ways you see yourself and how the world sees you? I’ll bet there’s a gap—maybe a little that you can just hop over, for others it might be a good deal larger. On the one side is our internal chatter which tells us we’re too much of this or not enough of that on the one side. On the other are the perceptions of those around us.
Imagine you’re walking down the street, feeling good, when suddenly, that infernal voice pipes up. “Should I be wearing this?” or “What will people think if you say no?” It’s the same voice that’s been with us since our teenage years, making sure we’re not too bold, too loud, too anything. But here’s the irony: while we’re busy second-guessing ourselves, others are often admiring the very things we’re questioning.
As we age, this perception gap can widen. We’ve heard for years what a “good woman” looks like, how she behaves. If we “step out of line”—wearing what we love, speaking our minds, or embracing our aging—that voice chastises us for being too much. But here’s the truth: the world sees our strength, our wisdom, our unapologetic selves, and they’re often in awe. Many see trailblazers, the women who’ve lived and learned and aren’t afraid to show it.
So why is there such a gap between their view and ours?
We’ve been conditioned to play nice, to be likable, to fit into the molds set out for us. This can lead to worrying more about others’ opinions than our own. But as we enter into and live our third chapter of life, isn’t it time to flip the script?
Closing this gap starts with us recognizing that the stories we tell ourselves might just be relics of a past that no longer serves us. We are not the same women we were in our 20s, 30s, or even 40s, and thank goodness for that! We’ve evolved.
What if, instead of worrying about how others perceive us, we focus on how we know ourselves? Let's start talking to ourselves like we would a dear friend—with kindness, encouragement, and some “'Atta Girl"!
Surrounding ourselves with women who see us for who we truly are can be transformative. These are the women who remind us to be bold, who laugh with us at the absurdity of societal expectations, and who cheer us on as we live authentically. This community can help us see us for who we really are.
So, bridge those perceptions, not with fear or self-doubt, but with a deep breath, a hearty laugh, and quick jump. Let’s start seeing ourselves as others do—strong, capable, and full of life. And most importantly, let’s close that gap by embracing the wisdom and power that come with age, because, my sisters, the world is already doing just that.
Join me at WonderCrone.com, where we’re redefining aging and minding those gaps!
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